Today was the King's Speech - and the great unwashed couldn't take a day off.
Jeremy Corbyn, the man Keir Starmer tried to get elected as Prime Minister twice, posted: "As the King's jewels arrived in a horse drawn cart - 4.5m children in this country are living in poverty."
Oh yeah, sell off our national treasures to fund more free school meals, Jeremy. Good grief.
Then the King and Queen arrived, which meant Black Rod had to go and knock on the door of the House of Commons - and one MP shouted out as he did it.
"Not now, Andy!"
And that sums it up, doesn't it - the King, dragged to the Houses of Parliament by a failing Prime Minister who is about to be challenged by at least two members of his own Cabinet and a bloke called Andy from Manchester, to deliver a speech setting out a legislative programme that will probably never happen.
So then the King set out Keir Starmer's pointless plans.
Oh great, Digital ID's back from the dead. That'll win everyone round, Keir.
Patrick Christys reacts to today's 'ridiculous' King's speech laying out the government's apparent agenda while Labour face turmoil from within
|GB NEWS
Closer ties to the EU. Amazing.
Labour's got a spanking in working-class, Brexit-voting areas. What does Starmer do?
Takes the knee to the EU - any points for guessing what kind of job he might be after when he's booted out of Downing Street?
Scrap jury trials. Yay! Driving a coach and horses through Magna Carta, glorious.
If you really believe that international human rights enthusiast Keir Starmer is going to do anything to curtail the power of the ECHR then you will believe anything.
But come on - the whole thing was absolutely pointless.
Wes Streeting went in to Downing Street to confront Keir Starmer, then 16 minutes later he came out of Downing Street. Good meeting was it, Wes?
Starmer could be out on his backside within days. Something Kemi Badenoch pointed out in the Commons today.
But what we saw today at the King's Speech was absolutely ridiculous and Keir Starmer must feel humiliated.
It was like inviting hundreds of people to celebrate your wedding anniversary when you and your wife know you've already filed for divorce.